It's a taboo for a man to say "I love you" to another man in any culture in our world especially that of Asian culture. The presumption is always made as homosexuality if a man dares enough to say "I love you" to another man. No one can deny that there is love between or among brothers, male cousins, male friends and male colleagues but normally not said out loud. What are men afraid of? Afraid of being classified as "soft", not masculine enough, as a particular group - homosexuals, that would put them in shame??
In my life, the only male friend I have ever said "I love you" to is Steven Ngo, my very good Vietnamese friend in California. I have only seen him three times since I moved back from San Francisco in 1994, twice when I went back to visit and once in Sydney recently in 3/2009.
I remember it was in Sydney Fitness First Center, when we were sweating away on the threadmills side by side. Suddenly, I was thinking of another very good friend of ours, Asad, and wishing he were with us. At that moment, I was so appreciative of life because after all these years, I could still meet Steven and having a good workout at the same gym on the other side of the planet. I just couldn't control myself and said to Steven how much I miss him in all these years and really love him as a friend, and my friendship for him is eternal. Steven reacted as "Tan, you are being too sentimental now!!", but I could tell, he was touched by what I said, and I am quite sure he felt the same for me.
Even if I never said "I love you" to Steven, I am quite sure he knows I love him dearly as a friend. It's definitely a different kind of feeling when it's said than felt. Saying "I love you" to a man, even a very very close friend, takes courage and lots of emotion...why is that?
In our male dominant society, we as men should break the ice, we should express ourselves and say what's in our mind out loud so that we would not be so suppressed by our emotion and sentiment. Let the love things out, to whoever you feel for, just say it "I love you" to anyone you care for or love regardless of sexes!!
When was the last time you said "I love you man" to a man?? And, are you man enough to say it??
For those men who still don't have the guts to say "I love you" to a man, please go to watch the movie, "I Love You Man"....learn something from the movie, it may serve you good in life!!!
